I've had muscle pain for quite a long time. Like ten years, a long time. Maybe longer. But it came and went, usually around a really hard workout or many classes, especially back-to-back classes. In the last ten plus years, I've taken a semi-trailer of ibuprofen to sleep, sometimes as much as 1000 mg. In the morning, the pain was gone and I would do it again. I would forget. Seriously, I would forget, I wouldn't think about it.
This fall, however, the pain stayed. And settled in. I started another job, teaching composition at a local college. I teach night classes, 6 p.m. to 9:40 p.m. three nights a week. Being on my feet three hours and forty minutes a night and my five Nia classes was what it took to for my body to get my attention, to make me remember. There were days I could barely walk and those days I mostly slept. I went to the doctor and found out there was nothing wrong with me.
Thus, the fibromyalgia diagnosis. When there's nothing organically wrong with the patient, and the patient is in so much pain she can't get through her days: fibromyalgia.
I've done a lot of research in the past six weeks. There are so many different theories on what causes fibromyalgia that one could compile an encyclopedia type book, organize them alphabetically and still remain answerless. I am one of millions of women who suffer from this condition, which has obviously gotten worse as I have aged. And I'm surprised that the treatment, and much of the information available, is not about the cause of the condition but about managing the symptoms.
I don't want to manage my symptoms. I want to heal my body. I don't want to restrict my life, I want to live it. I don't want to take pain meds, or anti-depressants. I understand completely how people lose their lives to this condition, but I don't want to lose mine. I want to know what causes this pain, and fix it, so I can get on with my life. I've got a lot to do.
I've received a lot of well meaning advice, thank you very much. However, cutting back on teaching my Nia classes isn't an option for me. Nia has not been the source of pain, the pain is in my body. And Nia is my Joy, my passion, the time when I feel most alive.
I'm taking mega doses of anti-oxidants and I think I feel better. Though my doctor doesn't agree with what I am doing. I'm going to try different things and see what works.
And in the meantime, I'll be on the dance floor.
